Corolla S

Let me introduce myself. Names oustandage, brand new to the site. I'm currently in my undergrad and I'm gaining some interest in copywriting. So I decide to start practicing since I find it pretty fun and challenging. Would appreciate your feedback.

Here is a spec ad idea I had for a advertising the new corolla S, or regular corollas. Since it looks much sportier compared to that last models, I think it's much more appealing to younger people. I decided on a USP for people that are looking for something sporty, but also want good gas mileage and backseat room for freinds, family, etc. I drew a rough sketch so I don't waste to much time if it's bad. This is my first spec ad, so I'm expecting the worse. In case my drawing sucks to bad. The car on the right is a van, could be a larger sedan. Car on the right is a sports car, not to extravagant. Bigger car in front middle is new corolla S. Van and sport vehicles parts are falling off and forming into the new corolla, saying we offer both. Copy is: Aligning needs with wants? Not needed.

Corolla S

14 comments

jteslik's picture
jteslik
1391 pencils

I get what you're going for here, but I think you got started in the wrong place with the USP. Try breaking down your product and describing it in one word. Or three words. Because "Like a sports car but with better gas mileage and room for friends in the back seat," while perhaps an apt description of the car, isn't something that's easy for you to work with from a creative standpoint. If you want to say "Sporty and practical" or "Practically sporty" (har dee har) then go for it.

After you figure that out, talk to me as a consumer in a way that incentivizes me to buy. That means benefits, not features. If it has great gas mileage, what does that mean for me? More spending money for going out to the bars? How about road trips with fewer stops? The features of your car need to be described in a way that's relevant to the lives of the people you're talking to. Tell them how it will affect them. I get that it has features of a sports car and an econo-box. What does this mean for me?

Last thing, try to keep in mind universal human truths. Great advertisements relate to human experiences and beliefs that we all share. There are hundreds of human truths about cars: you always love your first, you take pride in how you take care of your car, your car shares your experiences in growing up, you want to smack it when it breaks but love it again when it's back from the shop, etc. Figure out a truth that relates to the features and benefits you're selling. You can't just pull a human truth out of your ass, but when you find a great one, you'll know it.

Last thing I'll say is, have fun. I like that you're following a structure here and that your thought process is methodical. But your final execution has to be fun and cool and elegant, all while appearing completely natural. I think your image is very reminiscent of a venn diagram (which I don't find particularly fun or cool). If there's a better way to say what you're trying to say, then find it.

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

I remember reading online about writing good ads and it said just as you did, focus on benefits not features. What you said about universal truths also makes a lot of sense and I'm going to try a derive one. I'm thinking that there a universal truths about corollas just because they're so reliable. Maybe combine that with a universal truth for someone that owns a sportier car. Like, it will always be your first born child. haha idk. I'm just taking a shot at deriving one. I'm just curious, do your work at an agency? Freelancer? thanks for your constructive post.

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

jteslik's picture
jteslik
1391 pencils

I majored in advertising at U of I, but I didn't end up choosing it as a career path. I had the advantage of taking a couple of great creative courses taught by a really stellar professor. Most of my other classes were account side. I have part of a book together, but I just work on ads for fun. That and I frequent this forum because I enjoy the creative process. Hopefully my feedback is worthwhile and helps aspiring creatives; odds are in a few years you'll all know more than me, however :P

shanuea's picture
shanuea
781 pencils

What career path did you go with?

ShittyWaffle's picture
ShittyWaffle
114 pencils

That's truly some great advice, jteslik. I appreciate you taking your time to explain what happens during the creative process. Really took away a great deal from this.

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

Hey I saw your comments on another post that said you were going to ad school. which one?

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

ShittyWaffle's picture
ShittyWaffle
114 pencils

Sheridan College. Well technically I'm taking an Advertising and Marketing communications program so my studies cover all aspects of the industry from media buying to advertising sales, retail promotions, advertising planning and preparation to layout and copy writing. However, I'm a lot more interested in creative than anything else.

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

Oh cool. I got interested when I took a creative writing class. Sheridan college sounds familiar. Is it in the states?

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

ShittyWaffle's picture
ShittyWaffle
114 pencils

No, it's in Canada. I have the opportunity to take a creative thinking class for an elective next semester, but apparently it isn't what it's expected to be lol

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

Haha yeah that's cool. I wish i was in ad school. My classes are so boring

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

ShittyWaffle's picture
ShittyWaffle
114 pencils

By the way, do you know why I'm unable to start my own thread on these forums? I keep getting "Access Denied. You do not have authorization to access this page"

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

I went through that for the first two weeks of being a member. One day there was a "post new forum topic" button that appeared in the top right cornier of the forum thread page. I'm not sure what I did.

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

ShittyWaffle's picture
ShittyWaffle
114 pencils

"One day there was a post new forum topic" I don't know why that made me crack up lol maybe there's a settling in process of some sort before I'm the "chosen one".

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

Change your username to Neo, then it should work.

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

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