Divorce Attorney Elaborated

Trying to expand this out a bit. It's hard because it's such a sensitive topic, and I don't want to seem disrespectful to people who are going through it. At the same time, I think there's some fun to be had here. So here's two new lines for this sucker. I'll probably be resurrecting a lot of older ads of mine and try to really refine them. Might do some headline dumps just to see what people like.

Thanks for lookin'!

Divorce Attorney Elaborated
Divorce Attorney Elaborated
Divorce Attorney Elaborated

15 comments

jteslik's picture
jteslik
1383 pencils

Aaaanyone? :O

shanuea's picture
shanuea
781 pencils

I'd lose the capital letters.

Okay here's my thoughts on an advertising perspective: This kind of approach would be aimed at people who well and truly know their marriage is over and now just have the technicalities to sort out. They can perhaps see the humour in the situation and also be thinking of the advantages of getting it sorted out etc. The emotionally 'in the thick of it' type of horrible / child custody / ripping family apart / spouse cheated / divorce candidate is probably going to go for a more professional, discrete sounding attorney.

So this I would say is aimed mostly at childless couples - possibly professionals that are practical and perhaps a little materialistic (at least, know what they're entitled too) - are well and truly out of love by now, and of course have a sense of humour.

The ads themselves all make sense, they're not overly hilarious, but the humour is there. The ads overall work. Good job.

But if you want some critical nitty gritty (and I know you do). They do come across as a little on the 'safe' side, just a fraction. I think the black humour could be pushed a little more to make these really stand out. I know it's a sensitive topic but if you're going to take a risk with a black humour approach I think you should push it a little more.

I'm not suggesting you use the following line as it goes too far, I just saw it on a futurama meme. "Here's the money. Now fuck over my spouse."

Maybe make the lines a little naughty. You can now sleep with whoever you want, etc.

jteslik's picture
jteslik
1383 pencils

First off, thanks mucho for the critique. I think you're right about the target. I was trying to convey that there are perks to getting divorced, and I think that people who would appreciate these perks are people who are tired of their spouse/out of love, rather than emotionally unstable. I was also trying to convey a sense of confidence for the firm; they do things quickly, you're guaranteed to save money/keep the house, etc.

As far as the dark side, I could really hammer out some crazy offensive lines like the age old "Lose 200lbs of unsightly fat," but I'm afraid that takes away from the strategy a bit. People who appreciate those kinds of lines are either still married because they can't afford an attorney, or they're already divorced and I have nothing to offer them. My job, as I see it, is to take people who are contemplating a divorce and make them smile while reminding them of some simple perks of being single.

So are the ads safe? Yes. But that's very deliberate because of the sensitivity of the subject. And believe me, it's much harder to write safe lines that still have humor and convey a strategy (and make your firm seem relatively professional), than to write hilarious jokes that rag on one member in a relationship. And trying to avoid gender specificity and low blows is especially difficult. Bottom line: I don't think people want to put their financial future in the hands of someone making fart jokes :P

Shawali's picture
Shawali
8395 pencils

First one : great

Second : divorce aren't done instantly. It can take months, years even. You should revise this one.

Third : I don't get the 'or more' Anyway, it looks like a knock off of the first one.

And this how you do a short and to the point comment, not a long ass tell all diary =)

No one cares about child labor, eye donation or saving the Earth: NO PSA!!! http://adsoftheworld.com/forum/135094

jteslik's picture
jteslik
1383 pencils

Lol I like long comments, but that's how most of mine are :P

Second line: If you're talking about finalizing a divorce, yeah that takes a while. But you can easily move out/have your spouse move out if you're not already separated. I could think of another way to put it, but it won't be 4 words and I don't want it to read slower because of it. If you have any ideas, feel free to give it a go.

Third line: Yeah, it's kind of a knock off, but that doesn't bother me so much as the fact that I'm playing off the Geico line. It's sort of supposed to be, but I don't 100% appreciate parody advertising. The "or more" is supposed to A) reference to the Geico's "15% or more," and B) imply that your spouse could account for the majority of your insurance bill. Factors like gender, how new the car is, etc. all factor into insurance rates. I have nothing better for a third right now; it's not my favorite but it works well enough that I don't hate it.

EDIT: I think that in the order that they're in right now, it's difficult to imagine the payoff for the first-time reader. For the third line, you imagine someone driving down the road and going "50? Wasn't it 15?" and then they get to the URL and there's that "Ah ha!" moment. But as the forumer, you're already three lines in and know the payoff before you start. Don't get me wrong, third one is the weakest of the three, but I think it's workable.

dsklan's picture
dsklan
1927 pencils

you are a good copywriter, the ads you posted are the best in this forum... congratulations!

Martijn's picture
Martijn
1900 pencils

Not sure if I find the idea really easy or if you make it feel easy, but I agree with dsklan, you're a good copywriter.

My advice to you is to move on a bit. This kind of copy-based advertising exists since a long time and will probably stay forever, but the industry also reinvents itself constantly and your job today is more than write some clever lines. Why not take this strategy (or the Porsche one) and see how it could work as a viral, as an app, as a stunt etc.

Good luck.

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

Why does divorce cost a million dollars? Because it's worth it.

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

Shawali's picture
Shawali
8395 pencils

Finally get closer to your sister in law.

No one cares about child labor, eye donation or saving the Earth: NO PSA!!! http://adsoftheworld.com/forum/135094

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

Give your kids a tra... additional christmas!

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

AdillyWay's picture
AdillyWay
106 pencils

Tired of making sandwiches?

Shawali's picture
Shawali
8395 pencils

Welcome back, NBA season tickets!

No one cares about child labor, eye donation or saving the Earth: NO PSA!!! http://adsoftheworld.com/forum/135094

jteslik's picture
jteslik
1383 pencils

Help reduce noise pollution. Lower your gas exposure.

OUTSTANDAGE's picture
OUTSTANDAGE
81 pencils

Hire the attractive secretary.

sah dah tay my dammy. (The best copywriter ever whose name is Pootie Tang)

jasonesnorensen's picture
jasonesnorensen
8 pencils

Divorce should really be expensive.

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