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Please what do you think ?
Hi and welcome to the forum.
Unfortunately, this isn't working. First, it's punny. That's like one the first golden rules of advertising, at least the good kind: don't base your ad on a pun. It's a cheap and old way to get someone's interest.
Second, if you want to come up with spec ads, don't waste your time on PSA like this one. I won't elaborate on this, just click on the link in my signature to know what I mean. You're better off focusing on real product and services.
That being said, much props to you for making a sketch instead of going straight to Photoshop, like too many people do. You'll learn faster that way.
Keep on posting though, I'll be happy to give you my two cents.
No one cares about child labor, eye donation or saving the Earth: NO PSA!!! http://adsoftheworld.com/forum/135094
The layout is intentional, he wasn't going to comp this up. This is the comp, because it's supposed to look like a little kid's drawing. That said, I pretty much agree. While I think it's kind of clever, I think that if you can use copy to your advantage instead of this very simple dad=dead idea, you could keep the tag and have a decent campaign, even with the pun.
oh wow. i didnt even get it like that.
i thought it was just saying "dead" over the person that's not there.
youre right though.
It works but is underwhelming. No chance of campaigning it or making the art direction better.
There's a similar ad where they use the automatic spell checker on a SMS to do a similar thing - also works, but is also pretty underwhelming.
I wouldn't bother pushing this idea further, but good job on putting it together.
No, sorry. Doesn't work. Unless you're trying to make fun of the situation, in which case, more so: no.